Parting is Such Sweet Sorrow

In addition to being a famous line from William Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet, Parting is such sweet sorrow” it is also how many people sum up their experience when they decide to part with years of accumulated treasures. According to Rick Bauer, of Caring Transitions St. Louis, “Parting with personal belonging is often a bittersweet experience. Most people know they eventually need to cut back on their personal belongings, the challenge often is how to start and complete the process.”

If someone were to challenge you to part with 10% of your personal belongings how would you react? What if the challenge was 50%? Chances are some people may consider the challenge a welcomed opportunity to sift through, and get rid of things they have not recently used or used in years. Others might be frantic about the idea of parting with personal belongings they might need someday.

At certain stages of life, such as empty nesters choosing to downsize, or people moving to a retirement community, assisted living or nursing home, they are often faced with many difficult decisions such as which personal belonging to keep and which to part with.

When it comes to making a change in living arrangements, what often holds people back from making the transition and enjoying the new, often more carefree lifestyle, is parting with their personal belongings. Some people even experience an uneasy feeling or anxiety as they have an emotional attachment to their possessions.

“At Caring Transitions, we occasionally hear from our clients that the traditional moving process is rather cold and uncaring,” said Bauer. “People’s belongings have significance and stories behind them. For many people it’s not as easy as take this, ship the clock to Aunt Betty, and sell the golf clubs. People often need time and reassurance that they are making the right choices.

For others, they may have accumulated personal belongings over the years and may not know exactly what they might have in the many boxes and storage areas. As a result, the fear of accidently getting rid of something important, or which they might need one day, can paralyze them.

At Caring Transitions, we find that people make different choices based on their values, beliefs and even based on the urgency or speed at which they need to accomplish a move. Some of the more common approaches to parting with personal belongings include:
· In and Out - For everything new a person brings into the home, he or she must get rid of two similar sized items.
· Lack of Need - If you have not used or enjoyed something for over one year, you don’t need it and it is time to get rid of it.
· Replacement – Moving is an opportune time to treat yourself to things that are new. From the TV set, living room furniture, dishes and kitchen appliances, and more, purchasing new can help ensure a consistent style and that everything fits in the designated spaces.
· Legacy – Maybe it’s time to let others enjoy items that have meant so much to you over the years. People who give personal belongings to other often find tremendous satisfaction in giving and joy in seeing how others respond.

People often focus on the physical aspects of moving and by doing so overlook the emotional side. At Caring Transitions, we take great pride in helping people make informed decisions, sharing in fullness of the experience, and feeling good about their choices.

After all, it is not just a move, it is a caring transition. We support our clients as though we are an extension of their family,” said Bauer.